Lucky me, I seem to have won the Microsoft lottery three times.

Oh, wait a minute, it's a fake.

Damn!

Microsoft Corporation #1 Microsoft Way Redmond, WA 98052.Ref: BTD/976/06Batch: 401978G Dear Lucky Winner, WINNING NOTIFICATION!!! The Microsoft company successfully organised a promotion, over 1,000, 000.00 (One Million Great Britain Pounds) was earmarked for the Draws. Winners were randomly selected from a wide range of web hosts which we enjoy their patronage. computer draw system was used for selection attaching email addresses to ticket numbers. E-mail Address : attached to ticket 008795727498 with serial numbers BTD/9080648302/06 and drew the lucky numbers 14-21-25-39-40-47(20) which subsequently won you 1,000, 000.00 (One Million Great Britain Pounds) DATE:9/APRIL/2007 DRAW NUM: 1 It was held in London (UK) the claims agent assigned to you to, for the release of your prize Mr. Garry Jolly.,Head Winning Claims Dept. Email:microsoft.claimsagent@yahoo.co.ukTel.:+44 704 5710 478 Sincerely, Ereca K. JamesHead Customer care Service Microsoft Corporation #1 Microsoft Way Redmond, WA 98052.Ref: BTD/976/06Batch: 401978G Dear Lucky Winner, WINNING NOTIFICATION!!! The Microsoft company successfully organised a promotion, over 1,000, 000.00 (One Million Great Britain Pounds) was earmarked for the Draws. Winners were randomly selected from a wide range of web hosts which we enjoy their patronage. computer draw system was used for selection attaching email addresses to ticket numbers. E-mail Address : attached to ticket 008795727498 with serial numbers BTD/9080648302/06 and drew the lucky numbers 14-21-25-39-40-47(20) which subsequently won you 1,000, 000.00 (One Million Great Britain Pounds) DATE:9/APRIL/2007 DRAW NUM: 1 It was held in London (UK) the claims agent assigned to you to, for the release of your prize Mr. Garry Jolly.,Head Winning Claims Dept. Email:microsoft.claimsagent@yahoo.co.ukTel.:+44 704 5710 478 Sincerely, Ereca K. JamesHead Customer care Service Microsoft Corporation #1 Microsoft Way Redmond, WA 98052.Ref: BTD/976/06Batch: 401978G Dear Lucky Winner, WINNING NOTIFICATION!!! The Microsoft company successfully organised a promotion, over 1,000, 000.00 (One Million Great Britain Pounds) was earmarked for the Draws. Winners were randomly selected from a wide range of web hosts which we enjoy their patronage. computer draw system was used for selection attaching email addresses to ticket numbers. E-mail Address : attached to ticket 008795727498 with serial numbers BTD/9080648302/06 and drew the lucky numbers 14-21-25-39-40-47(20) which subsequently won you 1,000, 000.00 (One Million Great Britain Pounds) DATE:9/APRIL/2007 DRAW NUM: 1 It was held in London (UK) the claims agent assigned to you to, for the release of your prize Mr. Garry Jolly.,Head Winning Claims Dept. Email:microsoft.claimsagent@yahoo.co.ukTel.:+44 704 5710 478 Sincerely, Ereca K. JamesHead Customer care Service

In this scam, "Barrister" Johnson claims to represent his dead client and asks me to help him commit fraud.

He then finishes off his invitation to commit fraud by assuring me that this is perfectly legal. It seems to me that "Barrister" Johnson is not quite as au fait with the law as he would have me believe.

BARRISTER DEMOLA JOHNSON {SOLICITOR AT LAW}
OFFICE ADDRESS: ALHAJI SHEHU SHAGARI WAY
MATAM MASULE GARKI ABUJA.
TELE:+234-8022273491

Dear Friend,

I crave your indulgence as I contact you in such a surprising manner. I respectfully insist you read this mail carefully as I am optimistic it will open door for unimaginable financial reward for both of us. I am barrister Demola Johnson, a personal attorney to late Engr. Gilbert , a foreigner and an oil merchant/Contractor here in Nigeria. Herein shall be referred as my client, On the 21st of April 2002, my client, his wife and their two children were involved in a ghastly auto accident along Shagamu Express Road, unfortunately, all occupants of the vehicle lost their lives.

Since then I have made several inquiries to the Embassy to see if I can locate any of my clients extended family/relatives, this has also proved unsuccessful. I have contacted you to assist in repatriating the money and property left behind by my client before it will get confiscated or declared unserviceable by the Bank where my late client lodged this deposit.

The Bank where the deceased had an account valued at about $15.5million dollars, the management has issued me a notice as the personal attorney to the deceased to provide the next of kin or they will have the account confiscated within the next 21 banking days.

I seek your consent to present you as the next of kin of the deceased since you have the same surname so that the proceeds of this account valued at $15.5million dollars can be paid to you and then you and I can share the money in the following ratio:- - 50% will be given to you for your assistance - 50% will be for me.

All I require is your honest co-operation to enable us see that this transaction succeeds. I will like you to forward all these information across to me if you accept the proposal to enable me make an application to the bank with your name as the next of kin to my late client.

1. Your Full names / home address.
2. Your Age and Sex
3. Your private telephone/fax numbers.
4. Your Bank Account details.
5. your Occupation.
6. Any form of your identification such as international passport or Driver's license.

I guarantee that this transaction will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of law of your country.

Looking forward to your positive response.

Yours faithfully,
Barrister Demola Johnson.(Esq)

Take a look at this handy little map, which shows where the scammers live.

Scam map

Another fake lottery, one that doesn't actually even exist!

BRITISH CHARITIES LOTTERY PROMOTIONSUNITED KINGDOM. We are pleased to inform you of the announcements today of Winners of the MEGA JACKPOT LOTTO WINNING PROGRAMS. Your company or personal e-mail address, is attached to a Ticket number 123-765-90, with a serialnumber 42243-98-01 drew the Lucky Winning Numbers 06-14-17-28-30-41. You have therefore been awarded the total lump sum pay out of£1,000.000 credited to File Ref No: BCLP/ 24-FB-4234243/007UK. You must contact the claims department by e-mail; Name: Mr.Mark Anderson. E-mail: mark_anderson01@hotmail.comTel Phone: +4470-1113-7327 Congratulations once again from all our staff for being a part of our Promotions program.Mrs.Elizabeth GraysonOnline co-ordinator The society lotteries are managed by Sisson Marketing International Limited,certified by the Gambling Commission ELM Certification 180/3/2.© Charities Lottery 2007

How "refreshing", an invitation to commit fraud!

How stupid do these people think I am?

As ever, the response is but two words; the second being "off".

From: MR AZIZ MAZENBills & Exchange ManagerBANK OF AFRICA(BOA)TEL+226 70 33 56 53BURKINA-FASO WEST AFRICA. I am contacting you in regards to a business transfer of a huge sum of money from a deceased account. Though I know that a transaction of this magnitude will make anyone apprehensive and worried, but I am assuring you that all will be well at the end of the day. We decided to contact you due to the urgency of this transaction.PROPOSITION;We discovered an abandoned sum of $30M(Thirty Million United states Dollars) in an account that belongs to one of our foreign customers who died along with his entire family. Since his death, none of his next-of-kin or relations has come forward to lay claims to this money as the heir. We cannot release the fund from his account unless someone applies for claim as the next-of-kin to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidelines. Upon this discovery, we now seek your permission to have you stand as a next of kin to the deceased as all documentations will be carefully worked out by us for the funds $30M(Thirty Million United states Dollars) to be released in your favour as the beneficiary's next of kin.It may interest you to note that we have secured from the probate an order of madamus to locate any of deceased beneficiaries. Please acknowledge receipt of this message in acceptance of our mutual business endeavour by furnishing me with the following; 1. Your Full Names and Address.2. Direct Telephone and Fax numbers. These requirements will enable us file a letter of claim to the appropriate departments for necessary approvals in your favour before the transfer can be made. We shall be compensating youwith 30% on final conclusion of this project, while the rest shall be for us. Your share stays with you while the rest shall be for us for investment purposes in your country.If this proposal is acceptable by you, do not take undue advantage of the trust we have bestowed in you, I await your urgent email. Regards,MR AZIZ MAZEN

The illiterate scum bag who wrote this pile of shit would have me believe that he needs a nanny for his children.

Therefore I, being a middle aged male accountant, am the obvious choice!?

Suffice to say this pile of shit is a scam designed to elicit the naive and gullible to part with their personal details, so that the scammer can commit id fraud.

I just registered online and was going through resumes when you caught my eye so i have to register with my credit card to get your contact email after going through your profile and i think you fit the bill of the kind of nanny i will love to be by my 9 years old son mathew and 7 year old dauther laura when i am not around.
So down to the order of the day, i'm willing to pay you as much as 1100pounds per-week of which your basic salary will be 820pounds and the extra 280 will be for the up-keep of my kids when i'm not in town and also it comes with a very comfortable apartment inside my mansion and also a car to ferry my kids to-from school, you also get allowances periodically,
all i want from you is your total and complete devotion to my kids and my kids alone. I'm a single parent and also a quite successful medical doctor in the Europe most especially in the United Kingdom where i based, so because of my busy schedules i'll want you to really help in looking after my kids anytime i'm out of town on business which i hope you can do very well.I am not the homely type so you will have to take care of my children for me.I divorced my wife recently and i cannot let my children go with her so i need your help to take care of my children, whatever the amount may be, i can pay get back to me and i will get you a travel agent immediately.
If you're interested in getting this job and you want to know more you can contact me via my personal email address brylinkinc@hotmail.com so I can see what can be done to get you over here within the shortest period of time.
i'll want you to make available to me your personal data as follow
:
Full Name:
Current Place of Resident
Place of Birth
Age
gender
Personal Contact Telephone Number
Criminal Records if any

NB: Please i want to notify all would be applicants to be well aware that
i'll only be financing the following bills.

Flight Ticket

Nanny Association Reg Fee

Insurance Cover

and a visa for non-eu applicants, but please be well aware that i'll not be funding of your work-permit and resident-permit which you'll have to get yourself, the only
help i can render is that you can easily get it through the travel agency that will take care of your other travel plans.

I'll not entertain people looking for free hand-outs because i've been ripped too many times for me to fall victim again. The reason for insisting on anyone purchasing the work-permit and resident-permit is that even after you stop
working for me your work-permit is always there for you once you've gotten
it the first time.

Please also note that the purchasing of the Work-permi tand resident-permit will cost
723 pounds and 32pence, i've already spoken with the MD of the travel agency and he has already given me the bill of how much it'll cost to get a UK certified work-permit which will allow you work anywhere in the whole of Great Britain. Any interested person should contact him via his email address: ruud_wealthman@yahoo.com and he ll be glad to read from you, i want to inform any applicant that i really don't entertain time wasting and for that reason i've said i'll have to say all i want from anyone: all i want is your urgency and dedication to your job as my
nanny.

Regards


MORGAN LINKWOOD

Pah!

A lousy non existent 550K Euros in a fake lottery, not worth getting out of bed for!

Attention: Winner,

Congratulations to you as we bring to your notice the result of
Euromillion Loteria Español 2007 promotions.We are happy to inform you that
your email address have emerged a winner of Five hundred and fifty
thousand euro(550, 000.00)Euros.
NOTE: to file for your claim, please contact the claim department below
on email or phone

REDBOATH FINANCE AND SECURITIES,S.L
Contact person: Mr.Lopez Javier
Tell:34 696 756 270
Email:redboath007@aim.com
Find below your promotion date, Reference and Batch numbers. Remember
to quote these numbers in your correspondence with your claims agent (Mr.Lopez Javier)

PROMOTION DATE:10th of April 2007.
REFERENCE NUMBER: LSLUK/2031/8161/07
BATCH NUMBER: 15/051/IPD

Congratulations once again from all our staff and thank you for believing on email
communication and also for being part of our promotion program.

Sincerely Yours,

Mrs.jennifer lucia
THE PROMOTION COORDINATOR

Another scam lottery win has dropped onto my virtual email doormat. This one, from the improbably named Mrs Jason (a man's name surely?) Sass, informs me that I have won $5M.

Pah!

FROM THE DESK OF THE DIRECTOR INTERNATIONAL PRIZE
AWARD DEPT.

Attn. Lucky Winner,

WINNING NOTIFICATION FOR CATEGORY "A" WINNERS ONLY

We are pleased to inform you of the result of the last final annual draw of our Lottery International Programs.The online cyber lotto draws was conducted from an
exclusive list of 25,000,000 e-mail addresses of individual and corporate bodies picked by an advanced automated random computer search (AARCS) from the internet.
No tickets were sold.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address emerged as a winner in the category "A" with
the following numbers attached: Ref Number: PW EH 9590 OG 0612, Batch
Number: 563881545-NL/2007
and Ticket Number: PA 3502 /8707-01 You are therefore to receive a cash prize of $5,000,000.00. (Five Million United States Dollars) from the total payout
CONGRATULATIONS!!!. Your prize award has been insured with your e-mail
address and will be transferred to you upon meeting our requirements,
statutory obligations, verifications, validations and satisfactory report.

To file in for the processing of your prize winnings, you are advised to contact our Certified
and Accredited claims agent for category "A" winners with the information below:

*************************************
CLAIMS AGENT.
Name : Mr. Garret Van Pepple
Phone: +316 428 863 15
Email: gpepple1@yahoo.de
*************************************

You are advice to provide him with the following information:

Names:
Telephone/Fax number:
Nationality:
Age:

***NOTE: All winnings must be claimed not later than 14 days,
thereafter unclaimed funds will be included in the next stake. Remember to quote your reference Information in all correspondence.
You are to keep all lotto information confidential, especially your reference and ticket numbers.
(This is important as a case of double claims will Not be entertained).Members of the affiliate
Agencies are automatically not allowed to participate in this Program.
Furthermore, should there be any change of address do inform our agent as soon as possible.
Congratulations once more from our members of staff and thank you for being part of our promotional Program.***

Yours Faithfully,
Mrs. Jason Sass,
Lottery Co-ordinator

PHISH WARNING

The following phish is doing the rounds at the moment, it purportedly comes from Cahoot.

The link that the scammer invites the recipient to click on takes the recipient to a false site, designed to trick him/her into revealing their account access codes.

The scammer is illiterate and, as if to deliberately wreck his credibility, signs off from another bank (Nationwide).

Dear Cahoot Online customer,

The bank congratulates you as a devouted customer and rewards you with a shopping cheque of 500 pounds, but

We were unable to send your reward cheque due to a possible error your home address information.

This might be due to either of the following reasons:

- A recent change in your personal information .
- Submitting invalid information during the initial sign up process.

Consequently, we placed a temporary restriction on your account. We did this to protect your account from any fraudulent activity.

Please verify your information :

https://www.Cahoot.com

Thank you,

Nationwide Customer Service

How nice to have "won" $1.5M.

How sad that it isn't real!

Congratulations ! !


You have been approved a total sum of $1,500.000.00 USD (One million, five hundred United States Dollars), through an Internet Computer Draw System, extracted from over 1,000,000 email unions, associations, and corporate bodies that are listed online.

To file for your claim, please contact agent via email:

Mr. Zuruka Abena
Remittance Office
DMA SUPPORT
Email: dmasupport@hotmail.com
Tel: + (233) 24 686 4683
+ (233) 24 686 4684
Fax: + (233) 24 686 4685


with the following vital information:

Full Name:..........................
Full Address:.......................
Nationality:........................
Occupation:.......................
Age:....................................
Sex:........................................
Marital status:..........................
Phone number{land/mobile}:.........
So that he can commence the process of your funds remittance.
Thanks


DR. MRS SUZAN COOKEY.
Online Coordinator for the DMA Support.

This scammer claims to be the resident of a refugee camp, and writing from a nearby cyber cafe. Somewhat unlikely, wouldn't you think?

Hello Friend,

I know that this letter might be a surprise to you but do consider it as an emergency, i got your contact in reliable database.

I am Mr Paul Kagame 28 years old single and my late father was finance minister from Kigali Rwanda . I am here in Senegal with some legal documents that covering amount of money $5.5million USD under my name as the next of Kin that my late beloved father deposited in Bank in Europe.

I need your assistance for the transfer of the money to your position. I want to live the rest of my life in your country and invest with this money under your proper manage and care legally.If i join you i will further my Education then you will be investing with the money. I am presently in Dakar Senegal under UN in the Refugee Camp, i am sending this mail to you from near by Cyber Cafe.

Am waiting for your urgent reply so that we can proceed .

Mr Paul Kagame.

David Jones (didn't he used to be in The Monkees?) wrote to me today, with an entirely ludicrous proposition.

"Mr Jones" claims to represent Ken Lay, the disgraced ex CEO of Enron. In a delightful turn of phrase, "Mr Jones" notes that Mr Lay is "presently dead". I assume that this means we may expect him to rise from the dead at some stage in the future?

Anyhoo, "Mr Jones" wants me to help him commit fraud and lay claim to $9M (which of course doesn't exist).

He assures me that this fraud will be perfectly legitimate!

What a load of bollocks!

Dear Friend,

Good day to you. I am Mr. David Jones, a representative and attorney to
Kenneth Lay, the former chairman & CEO, Enron Corp.Industry: Energy &
Natural Resources Home, he was jailed and facing trial on charges of
corruption and embezzlement of funds but, presently dead .He deposited the
sum of Nine Million United States Dollars ($9.,000,000.00) with a certain
bank in asia under my care. I am contacting you because I want you to deal
with the bank and claim the money on my behalf since I have declared that
the Funds belong to my foreign business partner. I hope to trust you as a
God fearing person. I have agreed our sharing to be in the ratio of 60%
for me and 40% to you.

When I receive your positive response I will give you viable information
relating to this project i.e. the Bank where the money was deposited and
what is required to enable you lay claims to the funds, I intend to invest
on estates in your country which will be under your supervision and
advise. Please provide required informations below.

I guarantee you that this transaction will be executed under a legitimate
arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law. Get in touch
with me urgently by E-mail: (djones203@yahoo.co.uk) and provide me the

following:

1. Your Full Name and Address
2. Your Telephone and Fax Number
Best Regards,
Mr. David Jones.