Stupid Punts!

Stupid Punts!

Text

Examples of the "Nigerian scam" that flood my email box everyday.

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Since when were the UN in the business of running lotteries?

Promoting a more peaceful, prosperous, and just world
Dear Sir/Madam,
Congratulations from me and members of staff of the United Nation Foundation!
Your email address has just qualified you for this year donation, hence you have
been awarded the sum of 800,000.00, GBP(Eight Hundred Thousand Great British Pounds).
************************************************************
To file claim for your 800,000.00, GBP or for further details, please contact our
Financial Officer through the contact information below.
*************************************************************
Please quote your full names, Address and qualification numbers to our financial
officer for security reasons. Qualification number: (G8-222-6747, UNF-900-56)
quote in all discussions.
****************************************************************
Contact information below:
Financial Officer: Frank Williams
Tel:+44-704-570-1108
E-mail: claimsagent_unitedunit@yahoo.ie
****************************************************************
Finally, all funds should be claimed by their respective beneficiaries, Within
14 days of this notice. Failure to do so will result to outright cancellation.
On behalf of the UN FOUNDATION, kindly accept my warmest congratulations.
Regards,
Dr. Carl Johnson

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

The "Central Bank of Nigeria" wrote to me today. Seemingly there is an outstanding amount of $12M that they wish to pay me.

LOL!

FROM THE DESK OF: DR.ABDULAHI HAMZA,
OFFICE OF INTL REMITTANCE, CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA (CBN).
private email address: mno77225@yahoo.com.hk

ATTENTION:

CONTRACT NO: MAV/NNPC/FGN/MIN/009,VALUED AT(US$12M)
From the records of outstanding contractors due for payment with the
federalgovernment of Nigeria your name and company was discovered as next
on thelist of the outstanding contractors who have not received
their payments.

I wish to inform you that your payment is being processed and will be
released to you as soon as you respond to this letter.Also note that
from my record in my file your outstanding contract payment is
(US$12M) TWELVE MILLION,UNITED STATES DOLLARS). Please re-confirm to me
if this is inline with what you have in your record and also re-confirm
to me the followings:
1) Your full name.
2) Your Telephone, fax and mobile number
3) company name,position and address.
4) Your receiving Banking particulars.
5) Copy of your international passport.

As soon as this informations are received, your payment will be made to
you in a certified bank draft or wired to your bank account diretly
from Our Coresponding bank in abroad and copies of the transfer
documents will be given to you for you to take to your bank and
confirm when
the funds will be credited into your account.

Please get in touch with me first by my secured and confidential email:
YOURS SINCERELY,

DR.ABDULAHI HAMZA,
OFFICE OF INTL REMITTANCE, CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA (CBN).

Thursday, January 24, 2008

This particular scam from the "Uk National Lottery Organization" is particularly dismal.

1 Why are the two email addresses based in Japan and Spain?

2 Why is the winning amount in dollars, not sterling?

3 UK is spelt with a capital "K", not lower case "k"

4 "Organisation" is spelt with an "s", not a "z"

Complete crap from start to finish.

ukorgannization_organizationk12@yahoo.co.jp

Your email address has won $4.6M from the UK Lottery online draws held on the 1st January 2008 Lucky Number:MX014926583.Contact Mr. Jonathan Hou with your official names,country,address,sex/age,tel,occupation,date of draw on(jonathan_hou5@yahoo.es) for delivery of your cheque.Tel +44 70457 82357

- Uk National Lottery Organization

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Good grief, I have "won" this fake lottery theree times today!

Markt Lottery International Espanol
REF: ES-B3087RN-F
Calle Granvia,
Madrid,
Spain

WINNING NOTIFICATION FOR CATEGORY "A" WINNER ONLY

Attn Lucky Winner,

We are pleased to inform you that you have emerged asa winner in the final annual draw of our Lottery International Programs. Your email addresswas selected by our Electronic Random Selection System(ERSS) from an exclusive list of 800,000,000 e-mailaddresses of individual and corporate bodiesgenerated from an internet resource database. Notickets were sold.

Your email address is identified with Batch and Ticket Number: 444821545-ES/2008 in Category "A" and your claims portfolio isfilled with Ref Number: KPL/09-008/SP.You aretherefore advised to receive a cash prize of2,500,000.00 USD(Two Million, Five Hundred ThousandUnited States Dollars) from the total payout.

CONGRATULATIONS! Your prize award has been insured under a bonded depository policy with your e-mail address, and willbe transferred to you upon meeting the claimsrequirements,statutory obligations, verifications, validations andsatisfactory report.

To file for the processing of your prize sum payment,you are advised to contact our Certified and Accredited claims agent for category "A" winnerwith the information below:

************************************************

Richard Rozale
Tel: +34 662 498 548
Email: richard.rozale@yahoo.es
***********************************************
Endeavor to provide him with the following informations;
Names:Telephone/Fax number:
Nationality:
Age:
Occupation:
Regards.
Martin Prak.
Lottery Co-ordinator
REF: ES-B3087RN-F
Madrid,
Spain.

Saturday, January 19, 2008

This is, without a doubt, one of the most illiterate pieces of shit that I have received from a scammer in the recent few weeks.

Sadly there are people in the world who, because they are either greedy or stupid, fall for this.

ATTN;BENEFICIARY.

This is to officially inform you that we have verified your contract /inheritance file and found out that why you have not received your payment is because you have not fulfilled the obligations given to you in respect of your contract/inheritance payment.

Secondly we have been informed that you are still dealing with the none officials in the bank all your attempt to secure the release of the fund to you. We wish to advise you that such an illegal act like this have to stop if you wishes to receive your payment since we have decided to bring a solution to your problem. Right now we have arranged your payment through our swift card payment center Asia pacific, that is the latest instruction from Mr. President,Umaru musa Yar'Adua (GCFR) federal republic of NIGERIA.

This card center will send you an ATM card which you will use to withdraw your money in any ATM machine in any part of the world, so if you like to receive your fund in this way, please let us know by contacting the ATM payment department and also send the following information as listed below.

1. Full name
2. Phone and fax number
3. Address were you want them to send the ATM card to (p.o box not acceptable)
4. Your age and current occupation
5. Attach copy of your identification

We have been instructed to issue out $1,2m as part payment for this fiscal year 2008.
Also for your information, you have to stop any further communication with any other person(s) or office(s) to avoid any hitches in receiving your payment.Contact this ATM through this email address below;-

info_atmcardnigeria01@yahoo.com

Wait for your expedite response.

YOURS SINCERELY

DANIEL UBAH

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Oh great, I have won the UK National Lottery...again!

I have lost count as to the number of times that I have won this fake lottery.

Re their information requirements, they seem to have trouble counting beyond 6.

We happily announce the results of the previous week online draws ofover 300,000 email leads where six email addresses were randomly selected and that made the email addresses automatically winners of thesum of £516,778.00 GBP.

This is meant to inform you that your email address was among the six email address chosen which therefore means to say that you are a winner of the sum of £516,778.00 GBP which will be issued in a cheque onyour name in receipt of the requested datas below.

1.FULL NAMES:________________________
2.ADDRESS:_________________________
3.SEX:________________________________
4.AGE:________________________________
5.MARITAL STATUS:_____________________
6.OCCUPATION:_________________________
7.TELEPHONE NUMBER:___________
6.OCCUonoox47:
6.OCCUPATION:_________________________
7.TELEPHONE NUMBER:___________

Contact Our Claims Agent
Name: Mr Peter Taylor
Email ukgaming01@hotmail.com

After filling the form , you are to contact the claims office with the information filled in the form for further instructions and processing of your winning through the contact email address below. Congratulations from the staffs and members of the National LotterySweepstakes U K.
Sincerely,
Lucy Baines.
online Co-ordinator

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

An unusually short scam email.

However, it goes the same way as all the other scams; namely in the bin!

Dear Friend, I am Mr Andy Tombi the Former credit manager of SNS Bank in the Netherlands now based in united kingdom. I have a proposal to discuss about a certain bonded account in SNS bank, Please contact me through my email below if you are interested to know. It will be beneficial to all parties concerned. Regards, Mr Andy Tombi Tel:+ 44-701-115-0818 Email: mrtombandy1001@yahoo.it

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

The fact that this scam email starts off by talking about a "concealed business suggestion" should alert even the most naive recipient to the fact that this is a scam.

The scammer, for good measure, then offers me a deal involving unclaimed funds allegedly belonging to a dead Iraqi general.

A scam if ever there was one!

Mr. Patrick Chan.
Email: (patriwcchan1954@yahoo.com.hk)

Good Day

I am Mr. Patrick Chan, Executive Director and C.F.O of the Hang Seng Bank Ltd. I have a concealed business suggestion for you. Gen. Samir Abi Rahman who was with the Iraqi forces and also businessman made a fixed deposit for 18 calendar months, with a value of USD$24.5 Million only in my branch.

Several maturities notices was sent to him, before the war which began in 2003. also after the war another notification was sent and no response came from him. We later found out that the General along with his wife and only daughter had been killed during the war in a bomb blast that hit their home.

After more inquiry it was also discovered that this General did not declare any next of kin in his official papers.And he also confided in me the last time he was at my office that no one except me knew of his deposit in my bank. What bothers me most is that according to the laws of my country at the expiration of 6years the funds will revert to the ownership of the Hong Kong Government if nobody applies to claim the funds.

I want you to know that I have everything planned out so that we shall come out successful. There is no risk involved at all in this matter, as we are going adopt a legalized method and the attorney will prepare all the necessary documents. Should you be interested send me the following;Full names, private phone number, current residential address and I prefer you reach me on my private email address below after which I shall provide you with more details on this operation.

Your earliest response to this letter will be appreciated.

Kind Regards,

Mr. Patrick Chan.
Email: (patriwcchan1954@yahoo.com.hk)

Monday, January 14, 2008

The improbably named "garvn wallace" sent me this missive today.

I can't but help think that he meant to call himself "Garvin".

Hello you have won 915,810.00 great british pounds. contact Mr. garvn wallace on infocashout@strompost.com for more information on how you want the prize sent to you.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

I am afraid that this scammer kind of shoots himself in the foot in his first sentence "this letter is not a hoax".

It is!

THIS IS FOR YOUR ATTENTION.

We wish to inform you that this letter is not a hoax mail. we wish to notify you AGAIN, that you were listed as a beneficiary to the total sum of £3,600,000.00GBP (Three Million Six Hundred Thousand British Pounds) in the codicil and last testament of the deceased. (Name now withheld since this is our second letter to you). We contacted you because you bear the surname identity and therefore can present you as the beneficiary to the inheritance.

We therefore reckoned that you could receive these funds as you are qualified by your name identity. All the legal papers will be processed upon your acceptance by our legal representatives. In your acceptance of this deal, we request that you kindly forward to us your letter of acceptance; your current telephone and fax numbers and a forwarding address to enable us file necessary documents at our high court probate division for the release of this sum of money. Please contact me via my private email: so that we can get this done immediately.

Kind regards,

Mr.Ben Mark.
P&M Legal Consultancy Services
Telephone +44-70457 59907

Friday, January 04, 2008

A small piece of advice to the scamming scumbag who sent me this today, claiming that I have won money in the UK Lottery.

We don't spell "organisation" with a "z".

WINNING NOTIFICATION
Batch: 074/05/ZY369
Ref: UK/9420X2/05
Your ticket number: 56475600545 188 with Serial number 5368/05 drew thelucky number: 29

Congratulations, you have just won yourself £1,000,000 in the satellite software email lottery conducted by UKFREE LOTTERY ORGANIZATION in which e-mail addresses are picked randomly bysoftware powered by the Internet.

Your email address was amongst those chosen for this New Year promo(no ticket was sold) and you are to contact our Financial Controller for Clearance.

Mrs Eunice Justice(Clearance Oficer)
Email:clearanceofficereunicejustice1@gmail.com

you are to forward the following details to enable us clear your file for immediate payment:
1. Full Names
2. Address
3. Age
4. Sex
5. Marital Status
6. Occupation
7. Phone numbers
8. Fax number
9. Country

FREE LOTTERY BOARDUNITED KINGDOM. -- UTS CRICOS Provider Code: 00099FDISCLAIMER: This email message and any accompanying attachments may containconfidential information.

If you are not the intended recipient, do notread, use, disseminate, distribute or copy this message or attachments. Ifyou have received this message in error, please notify the sender immediatelyand delete this message.

Any views expressed in this message are those of theindividual sender, except where the sender expressly, and with authority,states them to be the views the University of Technology Sydney.

Beforeopening any attachments, please check them for viruses and defects.

Thursday, January 03, 2008

The new year starts as the old one ended, with scammers still trying to con me.

This badly written laughable attempt at a scam arrived today.

What on earth does the illiterate git mean by "enroot"?

Full stops and commas also seem to pose the scammer some problems, and as to what a "lesion" office is... well that's anyone's guess!!!

The information contained in this E-mail and/or attachments may contain protected health, legally privileged, or otherwise confidentialInformation intended only for the use of the individual(s)concerned.

If you, the reader of this message, are not the intended recipient, you are hereby advised to contact me for more detailed explanation

Attn: Fund Beneficiary,

I am Robinson kuku, The Executive Director Diplomatic Delivery Department of the African Development bank , This is to inform you that my office has taking over all International Money transaction originated from all partsof African country due to the miss appropriation of fundby some corrupt officials of the apex and commercial banks and excessive demand of upfront payment by some officials of commercial and apex banks,However your Name is among two other Names short listed for fund delivery in your country through a diplomatic means,

The money would be concealed in metal boxes and could be labeled as your personal belongingso as to obtain full diplomatic immunity coverage to ensure a hitch-freedelivery,You are therefore advised to contact my office as soon as you receiveThis mail for more detailed information.

The mode of operation:

1, You are to inform me the name of your nearest International airport toenable us enroot the diplomatic ticket correctly and also mail us first and second page of your international passport or any other identification as we shall also forward copy of the diplomatic passportto you for Identification on his arrival in your air port.

2, Your presence would be needed in your airport to receive the diplomat on his arrival so that both of you would move straight to your bank in lodging the money on your behalf therefore you will sign vital documentconfirming the intact receipt of your fund.Finally, Upon confirmation of your readiness in receiving your money we shall start processing necessary documentation as regard the safe deliveryof your fund to you in your country and the keys of the boxes including the fund delivery document which would be secured in your favor would be sent to you through FedEx overnight.

Most importantly the Certificate of claims Which indicates that you are the beneficiary of this fund as contract payment, lottery winner or Inherited money(next of kin) which is already with us would be sent toyou.Up on the confirmation of this mail I will give you more information.Do also provide me with your telephone numbers for further communication.

Robinson kuku

Executive Director,
Diplomatic Delivery Department,
African Development Bank,
London

lesion office
25 Dowgate Hill
London EC4R 2SB
Tel:+44-7821157007