Stupid Punts!

Stupid Punts!

Text

Examples of the "Nigerian scam" that flood my email box everyday.

Friday, December 28, 2007

This scammer would have us believe that he is resident in the UK.

One small problem, so am I.

Therefore why does he write to me saying that he wants to invest in my country?

Another small issue, his email address is not UK based.

Hello,

I am Mr Whales Woods, i'm from the United Kingdom, i would love to invest in your country, I have a substantial capital i honorably intend to invest in your country into a very lucrative business venture of which you are to advise and execute the said venture over there for the mutual benefits of both of us.Your able co-operation is to become my business partner in your country. and create ideas on how money will be invested, properly managed and the type of investment Meanwhile, on indication of your willingness to handle this sincerely by protecting our interests and upon your acceptance of this proposal, I would furnish you with the full detailed information, I shall be glad to reserve this respect and opportunity for you,if you so desire, but i do urge you to give the matter your immediate attention it deserves. Looking forward to your response. you can email me on woodsm09@yahoo.es
Thanks,

Whales Woods

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

The thieving lying scumbag who sent me this scam mail must be very keen to relieve me of my money, he sent it to me 6 times this morning.

Attention: Sir/Madam

This Is To Officially Inform You about our recent agreement with theFederal Government of Nigeria to handle all their foreign contractpayments. Based on this development We Have Verified YourContract/Inheritance File And Discovered Reasons Why You Are Yet To Receive Your Payment.

It Is Because Of Irregularities And Complications Discovered On YourPayment File By Our Technical Experts In Respect To Your Contract/Inheritance Payment Requirements Which Have Just BeenDuly Rectified. However, you are hereby directed by our intelligent monitory unit tostop any further dealings With Impostors And Non- Recommended OfficialsIn The Bank.

Such Acts Must Stop For Security Reasons . If You Wish Toreceive Your Payment in time and accordingly,Since We Have Decided ToBring A Solution To Your Problem, Right Now We Have Arranged YourPayment Through Our ATM Swift Card Payment Center Of OCEANIC BANK OF NIGERIA P L C. That Is The LatestInstruction By Our President, Alhaji Umaru Musa Ya'radua (GCFR) FederalRepublic Of Nigeria. Below Is The Arrangements ;...

The Swift card Center Will Send You An Atm Card Which You Will Use ToWithdrew Your Money From Any ATM Machine In Any Part Of The World, ButThe Maximum Is (One Hundred Thousand Dollars $100.000.00) Per Day, So If You Like To Receive Your Fund This Way Please Do Let Us Know ByContacting The ATM Card Payment Center Of OCEANIC BANK OF NIGERIA P L C

1) Address Where You Want Them To Send The Card Through DiplomaticCourier Service (P.O box Not Accepted)
2) Your Full Name
3)Occupation
4) A Valid Phone Numner Where you can be reached.

We have been Mandated by the Federal Government of Nigeria to issue out$5 million as part payment for this fiscal year 2007.

For Your Information You Have To Stop Any Further Communication WithAny Institution Or Office Until You Receive The Atm Card.Note: Because of Impostors, We Hereby Issue You Our Code of Conduct TagNumber Which Is (805) So You Must Have To Indicate This Code WhenContacting The Card Center .

Email: oceanic_bnkplc09@hotmail.co.uk if there is any question contact oceanic costumers service centeroffice via

E-mail:oceanic_bnkplc09@hotmail.co.uk

We Await Your Urgent Response.

Best Regards SIR. Daniel James

Manageing Director Information Department,
OCEANIC BANK Of Nigeria P L C.
Direct Phone No 234-8026900642

Monday, December 17, 2007

I commend today's scammer for creating a fake name that is truly "inspired"!

From: Mr.Perry Analfistula
Tel: 0034 634 193 461
Email: perrya247@yahoo.es
Madrid
Spain.

Good day to you.

I am Mr. Perry Analfistula, an Accounts Clerk with one of the major banks in Spain. I came across your email address during a thorough search for a reliable and trustworthy person who can assist me carry-out a mutual and benefiting transaction in my bank. Only recently I discovered that an account belonging to a Foreign customer name Mr. T.K. Lusk has remained dormant for the past four years, after intensive investigations, I found out that Mr. Lusk, died along with his wife and only son on 12th January 2003 in a ghastly motor accident. Before he died he deposited the sum of USD25.000,000.00 (Twenty Five Million US Dollar) in our Bank here in Spain.

At this point I am contacting you concerning a business acquaintance that necessitates you to act as a new beneficiary as a next of kin to the said dormant account as I hope to give you more technical details on how we can transfer the funds into your nominated account.

Please if you are interested reach me with your personal details such as full names, address (home/office), phone numbers to enable me give you full details of our plans to success.

Reply me to this email address: perrya247@yahoo.es

Sincerely yours,

Mr.Perry Analfistula

Thursday, December 13, 2007

The Fondation De France wrote to me today to tell me that I have qualified for a donation of $1.7M.

Then, for good measure, they wrote to me again half an hour later to tell me that I have qualified for a donation of $1.7M.

It's going to be a good Christmas!

Be notified by our organization that your email id has just qualified you for the Donation of $1,650,000.00.

By this notice you are advised to contact the financialoffice for further instructions on how you are to claimyour $1,650,000.00. Please quote your Full Names, Address and qualification numbers to our Executive Sec with your Qualification number:(E-57-10747, R-456-76)

Executive Sec.
Mrs. Ashley Tyler
Email: ash_tyler01@sify.com

Finally, all funds should be claimed by their respectivebeneficiaries not later than 14 days from today.
Best Regards,
Mrs. Emily Cole

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

My thanks to the improbably named "Mrs Cherry Martins" for writing to me to tell me that I have won a lottery.

It would have been possibly more convincing had she not misspelled the subject line:

"End of Yaer Winning Notification".

The Marina Offices,
The National Lottery
P O Box 1010Liverpool,
L70 1NL
UNITED KINGDOM

(Customer Services)Ref.
Number: 132/756/4534
Batch number: 638901527-AMB/02 RE/ AWARD NOTIFICATION:
FINAL NOTICE

Sir/ Madam,

We are pleased to inform you of the lottery result winners of Laprimitiva International lottery programmes held on 15th November 2007. Results were finally released on 2nd December, 2007. For the 2007 edition.

It is a promotional program aimed at encouraging internet users; therefore you do not need to buy ticket to enter for it. Your e-mail address was attached to ticket number 27522465896-6453 with your serial number 3772-554 drew you a lucky number 1-2-3-21-23-49 which consequently won in the 3rd category,you are therefore been approved for lump sum pay out of Ă‚£500,000.00 (Five Hundred Thousand Pounds).

Due to mix up of some numbers and names, you are advised to keep your winning information confidential until your claims has been processed and your money remitted to your nominated bank.This promotional programme takes place every three years.

To file for your claim, please contact our claim agent.

Mr.Robinson Cole
Tel: +44 704 572 9911
Fax: +44 870 133 7991
Email: mail@prizess.vossnet.co.uk
Official Email: infosprizes@yahoo.gr

Endevour to fill him with the below required informations
Claims Requirements:
1. FullName:______
2.Address:________
3.Age:______
4.Occupation:_______
5.Phone/Fax:____
6.Present Country:_______
7.Marital Status:_____
8.Gender:______
9.AmountWon:_____
10. E-mail address:__

Once again congratulations.
Best regards,
Mrs. Cherry Martins,
Lottery coordinator.
****CopyrightĂ‚©2006-2007 The National Lottery Inc.
****All rights reserved. Terms of Service - Guideline

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

This scammer, for once, is not trying to con me into believing that I have won anything. He is trying to persuade me that he is a money lender.

Unfortunately he kind of lets himself down, on a number of points. Two of the being:

-The message subject "Loans Offer Xams Offer". What exactly is "Xams"?

-He sent me the same email four times in the space of one hour.

Good day,

I am MR HOWARD THOMAS a money lender i give out the following. Bussines LoansPersonal Loans Loan To Pay Off BillsLoan to Pay Off Debts Unsecure LoanSecured LoanInvestment Loans Credit Card Loans And many more Are you looking for money to pay bills?

If you are in need of loan in your next email i want youto let me know how much you need as loan so that i can provide you thecompany loan terms and conditions.

You can contact me Via this email address:
1717 Four Seasons Blvd.
Hendersonville,
NC 28792
USA.
EMAIL:mrhowardthomas3@hotmail.com
BORROWERS INFORMATION
Your names ................................
Your country...............................
Your address..............................
Your Age...............................
Your Fax Number...................
Your occupation..........................
Your marital status ......................
Current Status at place of work.........
Sex...................................
Phone number..............................
Monthly Income...............................
Amount Needed...........................
Thanks.
MR HOWARD THOMAS

Monday, December 03, 2007

A million Dollars and a new Honda, it must be a scam?

Of course it is!

HONDA INTERNATIONAL HEADQUARTERS
Address: No.1-1, 2-chome,
Minami-Aoyama,
Minato-ku,
Tokyo,
Japan 13-3 Ichiban-cho,
Chiyoda-ku,
Tokyo,
102-8414 Japan
HONDA INTERNATIONAL HEADQUARTERS Address:
No.1-1,
2-chome,
Minami-Aoyama,
Minato-ku,
Tokyo,
Japan 13-3 Ichiban-cho,
Chiyoda-ku, Tokyo,
102-8414 Japan
The Board of Directors,
members of staff and the International Awareness Promotional Department of the Honda Automobile Corporation, wishes to congratulate you as one of our FIVE (5) STAR PRIZE WINNERS in this year Honda Automobile International Awareness Promotional Program (IAPP), held on December 3rd, 2007, in Tokyo, Japan.

Your e-mail address attached to ticket number: 56475600545 drew the lucky numbers: 20-22-23-26-31-47 that subsequently won IAPP lottery in the2nd category.Therefore, you have been approved to claim a total sum of $1,000,000 (ONE MILLION DOLLARS). You are eligible for our drawing of a brand new Honda; if you win, the great news is that you get to select from any of our models. The car comes with Honda Insurance Coverage for one complete year.

Again, congratulations on your present winnings and as I said you are now eligible to also receive a brand new Honda of your choice!

FURTHER ENQUIRIES PLEASE CONTACT .............................................................................. Name: Mr Paul Brown IAPP Claims Officer EMAIL:hondamotorltd10@yahoo.co.jp

Please contact Mr.Paul Brown with all details given in this mail. He will assist you with your winnings and enter you for the drawing for your brand NEW HONDA.

Reminder: all prize money must be claimed no later than ONE MONTH. All funds not claimed on or before that date are subject to forfeiture and or penalties accordingly.

NOTE: Please remember in all correspondences with our claims officer to remit all given ticket numbers this will avoid unnecessary delays. Sincerely yours,
Tetsuo Iwamura,
Director Lottery Operations HONDA INTERNATIONAL HEADQUARTERS
Address: No.1-1,
2-chome,
Minami-Aoyama,
Minato-ku,
Tokyo,
Japan 13-3 Ichiban-cho,
Chiyoda-ku,
Tokyo,
102-8414,
Japan.
Web http://www.world.honda.com