Stupid Punts!

Stupid Punts!

Text

Examples of the "Nigerian scam" that flood my email box everyday.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Great I have won a lottery based in Croydon (my home town).

Why don't I just pop round and pick up my winnings?:)

National Lottery,
28 Tan Field Road,
Croydon,
London.
Ref: UK/9420X2/68
We are pleased to inform you of the final announcement of the UK
National Lottery Online thunderball Programme with draw numbers(#628)
09, 14, 24, 25 ,34, 10 held on 17th SAT FEB,2007.
Mr.Kelly Martins.
Email: claims_kellymartins@yahoo.co.uk
Provide him with the information below:
1.Name:
2.Address
3.Marital Status:
4.Occupation:
5.Age:
6.Sex:
7.Nationality:
8.Country Of Residence:
9.Telephone Number:
10.Fax Number:
11.Email Address:
12.Draw Number above:
You can go to our online result site to confirm
the value of your winnings and also get a prize
breakdown:-www.national-lottery.co.uk/player/p/results/results.do
Yours faithfully,
Robert Barr

Friday, February 09, 2007

How stupid do these scumbags think I am?

OFFICE OF THE SENATE HOUSE
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
ASO- ROCK VILLA, ABUJA (F.C.T)

Attn: My Honorable Contractor,

I, The Senate President ,Federal Republic of Nigeria , Dr Ken Nnamani (GCFR) and the Governor of Central Bank Of Nigeria , Prof Charles Soludo in Conjunction with the EFCC Director , Mallam Nuhu Ribadu, held a meeting last week concerning contract payment , both foreign and local contractors and some inheritance funds.

On going through contractors file yesterday, we discovered that your file was dumped untreated, so at this juncture, we apologize for the delay of your contract payment and please stop communicating with any office now and attention to the appointed office below for you to receive your payment accordingly.

However,I wish to inform you now that your outstanding contract payment is ($18,500,00,Eighteen Million Five Hundred Thousand Dollars U.S.A} United States dollars).
Now you’re new Payment Reference No.-35460021, Allocation No: 674632 Password No: 339331 , Pin Code No: 55674 and your Certificate of Merit Payment No : 103 , CBN Released Code No: 0763; Immediate Telex confirmation No: -1114433 ; Secret Code No: XXTN013, Having received these vital payment number , therefore You are qualified now to received and confirm Your payment with the Federal Government of Nigeria immediately within the next week.

Now you are directed to contact the Office of the Wire and telex Department Dr Edward Ralph immediately so that he will pay you and fax you the payment Copy Slip and also you should reconfirm your Banking Details, Secret Code No: which is ( XXTN013), this is to avoid mistake while transferring your overdue contract payment to you today .

Contact Person:
Name: Mr. Tony Elumelu, MD UBA Group.
Address: United Bank for Africa
UBA House, 57, Marina Lagos.
Tel:+ 234-80-304-265-08.
Email;tony_elumelu_uba@yahoo.co.uk

Contact him now and inform him that you received a message from the Senate President Federal Republic Of Nigeria, Instructing you to contact him for immediate release of your contract payment and forward your Details to his office to avoid transfer mistake
NOTE: We have mounted our security network to monitor every in-coming calls and emails, if we still find out that you are still dealing with all those fraudsters that have been frustrating you for years, I shall stop and cancel your payment immediately .

Best Regards
Dr Ken Nnamani (Senate President)

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

This scammer asks if I can be his partner.

The short answer is NO!

Maybe if:

1 He learnt to write English, and

2 He wasn't a crook, and

3 He wasn't asking me to commit fraud

Then the answer might be different.

CAN YOU BE MY PARTNER?

Greeting's

It is my pleasure to write to you and i am very sorry if this missive will be sounding embarrasing to you.

However is not mandatory nor will I in any manner compel you to honour against your will, please even if you are not going to help me on this proposal, kindly let me know, meanwhile, i decided to contact you after going through you profile.

I am Dr. Hussein Ibraheem , and works with FIRST PRUDENT BANK COTE D'IVOIRE here in West Africa as the manager auditing and foreign bills. Here in this company existed a deposit for the past 6 years with A/C No:ECB2446983652 which belongs to late Dr Malik Mustafa an Arabian Nationality who worked with Shell Development Company here in West Africa, who died on September 11 in the United States Bomb Attack.

When I discovered that non of his relatives came for this deposit, I decided to carry out a system investigation and discovered that non of the family member nor relations of the late person is aware of this deposit.This is the story in a nutshell.

Now I want someone from overseas who will be presented to the company as the bonafide next of kin so that this fund will be transfered on his/her name, thereafter, I had planned to destroy all related documents for this deposit, It is a careful network and for the past eleven months I have worked out everything to ensure a hitch-free operation,The deposit is intact and stands at-(US$7.5M) Seven million five hundred thousand united states dollars.

what is needed now is a foreigner then i will forward you with related information to back-up this claim successfully.

Now my questions are:
1. Can you handle this project?
2. Can I give you this trust?
3. What will be your commission? If you can sponsor this transfer, as i have maped out 10% of the said fund for charity.

Please consider this and get back to me as soon as possible, Finally,it is our humble prayer that the information as contained herein be accorded the necessary attention, urgency as well as the secrecy it deserves.

To prove to you how authentic this great opportunity mean to both of us,I hereby assure you that if we do not have this fund lifted in 10 days time upon the day of application,then withdraw from this transaction.

Please for our subsiquent communication and contacts kindly send me the following when replying :
1,Your private mobile number.........
2,Contact address.........................
3,Your real names..........................
4,Fax number .............................
5,You shall also open an empty/blank Bank account which shall have no money on it to avoid conflict between the both of us , this is where this funds shall be transfered into.

I expect your urgent response if you know and believe you can handle this project, send me an email for confirmation at hussheem2007@yahoo.com

Yours Respectfully ,

Dr.Hussein Ibraheem

Monday, February 05, 2007

This scammer claims to work for Amstel Pilsner Beer, and claims that I have won $1.5M.

Which of course I haven't!

Personally I would have preferred some beer.

Amstel Pilsener Beer,
Herengracht 282,
1016 BX Amsterdam.
Postbus 3462,
1001 AG Amsterdam.

Good Day,

We are pleased to inform you that you are amongs the ten winners of One
Million Five Hundred and Fifty Thousand Euro (€1,550.000.00) from
Amstel Pilsener Beer Company Annual Promotions.

Due to mix up of Numbers and Names, we advice you keep your winning
information very confidential till your claims has been processed and
your prize / money Remitted to you. This is part of our security
protocol to avoid unwarranted abuse of this program by some
participants, on that regards you are to quote your REF:7649082 and
PIN: 5628454 number when contacting the payment officer with the
details below for the release of your prize.

Name:Mr.Bianca Eppinga
Email:amstelrewardpromo1@yahoo.co.uk

Congratulations once more on your winning award.

Accordingly.

Mr.Hendrik Klaas.
Amstel Pilsener Promotional Officer.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

This scammer seems to think that I will be suitably impressed by him assuming the title of Doctor.

I am not.

LOTTERY TICKET NUMBER; CA235676778
S.F.C.N: ALC1679087678/2006/TH
Batch Number VCF:578999008777AAF

We wish to inform you of the yearly sweepstakes program that youre-mail addresshas won an award sum of a total cash prize of 1,000,000.00 (ONE MILLION,Dollars)in the 2nd category.

Do contact the PROCESSING DEPARTMENT detail below for your Claim. You areadvised to quote your BATCH NUMBER AND TICKET NUMBER for your claim.

DR.LUKE DAVIES.
Promo Claims Manager.
Email:ecoworldintern@gawab.com
ecoworldintern@aim.com
TEL: +31-610-698-963.
***********************************************
Yours faithfully,
MR.JOSS BOUMAN (Mrs.).
TEL/Fax; 0031-610-698-903
INTERNET SWEEPTSTAKES LOTTERY COORDINATOR.